Libby
Adult Member
Posts: 2,984 
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Post by Libby on Nov 29, 2021 7:26:22 GMT -5
OK, but some context please. How old are the kids..5, 12, 17? Do the parents go to church? Are there specific reasons that the parents require them to be at church? Are there specific reasons the kids object to going? Sweetheart, there are many things children will and do see differently than their parents and I think that's a good thing because it says we're raising independent thinkers. You will not raise your children exactly the same way your parents raised you. You will decide what values are important for your family and how you will help your child develop a moral compass. In my home our values are ones that come from our faith and it is through fellowship with our church community that we tweak our moral compass. I make my children do many things they may not like in the moment because I believe it is what is best for them. Grumbles in the morning when they have to get up and go to school. Grumbles at night when I say bedtime. Grumbles when I tell them they've had enough lollies and to eat their vegetables. Grumble, grumble, grumble. It is a parent's prayer that you will someday understand why we ignored your grumbles and made you do what you didn't want to do and going to church is one of those things. |
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Post by laurensobuf on Nov 29, 2021 7:38:10 GMT -5
OK, but some context please. How old are the kids..5, 12, 17? Do the parents go to church? Are there specific reasons that the parents require them to be at church? Are there specific reasons the kids object to going? You are getting some very good input here from parents, those who require their kids to go to church with them and those who don’t, on faith and values. I can’t add more to the excellent points that have been made. If I took what you were telling me at face value, and not just an excuse for getting out of something you didn’t want to do, I would want to be sure you understood enough about the faith you were raised in before I let you walk away from it. In my faith, you make professions to what you believe and when you are confirmed in your early teens, it is a sign of maturation into your faith. So, I would want to understand why your beliefs had changed and what specifically were you now seeing differently that did not square with your faith. And before I conceded any of that, I would want you to get additional perspective, from a priest or through religious instruction if you were not still getting it, to be sure you understood your faith well enough to make this determination. After that, I would be open to a conversation about attending church with me. But that conversation would also cover what you would be doing with that hour on Sunday if you were not with me. Is there another church you could be attending? Could you be volunteering or doing something in service to others? That point that Libby made about promising to raise you to be a part of the community doesn’t end for me just because yiu don’t want to go to church anymore. Sunday |
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quinn
Adult Member
Posts: 5,906
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Post by quinn on Nov 29, 2021 10:59:51 GMT -5
Growing up, Kingdom Hall happened at least twice a week. I went when I was told to go and if I dared to question it, I went with a sore behind. The obligations of being Catholic are much easier than what was expected of me as a Jehovah Witness but I still fall short. I really should get my butt back into the church. My kids are all baptized Catholic and they do go to church and CCD with my ex. My ex is a good Catholic. I'm the lazy one. The combination of my experiences while growing up and then my experiences as a Catholic have me conflicted. I don't like to force because I remember how that felt but my ex has no problem forcing because he finds going to Mass a healing experience. He too grew up JW. I do want my kids to find the comfort their dad finds in the church so I don't have a problem with him making them go. I like that they go. I guess where my conflict is, is I know I'm being a hypocrite when they are made to go and I stay home and have another cup of coffee. Well done Addy, you have made me feel guilty.  |
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mandy
Teen Member
Posts: 3,889
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Post by mandy on Nov 29, 2021 14:20:51 GMT -5
I think it would be nice if our parents didn't force us to do stuff.
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Rosie
Teen Member
Step out of the sun if you keep getting burned
Posts: 8,032
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Post by Rosie on Nov 29, 2021 16:05:45 GMT -5
I think it is nice when whole entire families go to church together.
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Post by heather on Nov 30, 2021 15:07:40 GMT -5
I can see an argument for letting an older teen not go, 16-17ish.
But if I'm being fully honest, unless there's a darn good reason, the rule here is probably always going to be "if you live here, you'll be in church on Sunday unless you are sick"
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Addy
Teen Member
Posts: 6,283
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Post by Addy on Nov 30, 2021 18:36:20 GMT -5
I think it would be nice if our parents didn't force us to do stuff. |
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Post by Kim on Nov 30, 2021 22:00:09 GMT -5
And I wish my employer wouldn't force me to do stuff.
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Addy
Teen Member
Posts: 6,283
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Post by Addy on Dec 1, 2021 8:18:12 GMT -5
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